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From May 2009
A dream is a wish your heart makes....or so the song goes right? So what happens when the dream seems so far out of reach that wishing is too small. I guess that is where faith comes in. Well let me stop there and give a little background. Hubby and I have spent the past ten years weathering the ups and downs of being best friends and happily married - we have had hard times, thats for sure but all in all, life has been good. With one exception that is, we are still waiting for the rest of the family. Not for lack of trying mind you - in fact, you could say we have tried so hard that is kind of like that kid who holds their breath until they can’t hold it anymore. We have prayed all the prayers, done all the tests, practically stood on our heads and still no little bambino to call our own. We know we will be good parents, heck even great parents - so what’s up right?
So I am now affectionally calling our home phone the bat phone - why you may ask. This was the phone I previously used for work purposes, however thanks to a snazzy new set up I have a separate VoIP phone for that use. So this home phone became the “adoption hotline” aka the bat phone (reminds me of Batman waiting for “the call”). Because we rarely give the number out for anything other than the adoption inquiries, when it rings my heart jumps a little. I find myself trying not to look at it - trying to employ the “watched pot never boils” technique.
Well all this to say - the bat phone rang a bit ago. Luckily I was not on a call so was able to answer and it was a response on one of our inquires for a 5 yo girl and a 6 yo boy. She was asking for our homestudy, which I just emailed her. The matching for them will be in the coming weeks. For those of you not familiar with a matching....which I totally wasn’t.....it is equivalent to a group of caseworkers and interested parties for the kids getting in a room and reviewing the home studies - based on the needs of the kids, they decide who would make a good fit. Then those people are considered matched. Its hard to wait for these decisions to be made by others, but this is where I am having to have faith that we will be a match (soon) to the right kids. The odds also can feel a bit overwhelming, one worker told me that she had over 40 homestudies for a set of kids - how do you stand out in that - thats where my faith in God comes in I guess - I believe this will happen in the right time.
So how does this work?? I get that question a lot. I figured I would spend a couple posts (while waiting) letting you know how the process works. The first thing you do is go to an interest meeting. These are usually large meetings of twenty to thirty couples or individuals that are interested. At this meeting they explain the process - however, there is so much information given that I doubt anyone really comprehends exactly what is involved. We have been to two interest meetings, one in Texas and one in Florida. Every state does them different. And every state has their own “rules and procedures.” At the Florida one, they brought in the adoption attorney, case worker, and other relevant speakers. Then they pass out the list to sign on the line if you are interested in moving forward. I would say about 2/3 of those who attend sign up. In our case, enough people were interested that they decided to set up two classes - the one we were set up in of course started second - my first “wait” in this process!
Ok more later - back to not looking at the bat phone.......
WAIT - bat phone rang again - twice in one day!! One of the case workers I had talked to was calling back to tell us she really, really liked our homestudy and had a sibling group she thought we would be a great fit for. They are a little older than the ones we first inquired on - 9 and 12, but have no medical or developmental delays.....have to talk to hubby now.
From June 2009
we have a disclosure meeting for sibs we have been really interested in set up for Monday.
But you know, as I sit here, I feel so blessed. We are closer. Closer to that family we have been waiting for. Closer to a decision that will change our lives forever. Closer to God’s will for us. I started a journal to my new kids (now that sounds weird to type - well not sounds since you can’t hear it ...well anyways you know what I mean).
Oh and for anyone wondering about the bat phone - we are not speaking right now. It seems to only bring in wrong numbers lately. I have put in on phone probation :)
Monday will start a new week - I have the day off and we are going to a disclosure meeting for one of the sets of sibs. I really like this CW - she has been awesome to work with, so we will see how it goes. I am learning not to get hopes up on anything yet.
.....AND THEN
So this week has been a whirlwind - an exhausting, exciting whirlwind. Monday we had a disclosure meeting for a group of siblings we had inquired on over a month ago and had been working with the AS (Adoption Specialist) off and on. This was the group I was really interested in on the 2nd day we started inquiring. Over the past month we had gathered info from the AS on them and were informed about a week or so ago that we are were a match.
we drove about 1 1/2 hrs down to their office and spent the next 3 hrs talking with therapists, case worker, AS, supervisor and the guardian ad litem (the volunteer assigned by the court as the children’s advocate). It was a great meeting - we were able to ask all kinds of questions, got a ton of info and left with about 8 inches of paperwork - copies of all paperwork in their file, the only pics taken of them and a sense of excitement.
So we went home - I looked through the paperwork and we talked more, and we decided - these are the ones we want to move forward with. Woohoo!!
So we called the AS and they set up a meeting for us for today. So long story short and another drive down and we got to spend almost 3 hours with the kids. They have so much potential and are so unique - adorable.
So for those of you that have asked - here is what I know so far. (Note: because they are still officially foster kids I will not be using their names here and will not be posting pics until I tighten up the distribution list. If you are on this and suddenly cannot get on, please email me and I will send you the updated info.)
Okay so back to details - 3 boys (yes, we may be crazy but what the heck.......let’s just get the whole family at once!) So keep in mind we just met them so I don’t have a lot of details on their likes yet....
Big Bro (9) - likes baseball, disney movies, favorite colors are red and green, loves to run!
Shy guy (6) - still working on his likes, he does like crafts - especially cutting and gluing
The charmer (5) - likes dark blue and light blue (he was very specific), favorite movie is Monsters Inc, LOVES to color and draw (and he is very talented if I do say so)
So that’s the basics - we are exhausted - not so much physically as emotionally, I want to thank all of you who have prayed with and for us - please keep us in prayer going forward until we can bring our boys home and there are no challenges that arise.
From here we will do another supervised (AS/CW present) visit - probably next week, then we will do some unsupervised visits and probably a weekend or two. Finally, it will be time to bring them home. The goal is to get them here before school starts in August (ok so that’s my goal but you know I can be persistent :). We have a ton to do. Stopped at IKEA looking for bunkbeds today but would you believe they were out of twin mattresses? What is there a run on twin mattresses in Florida or something? I did pick up 2 sets of kid size hangars - thrilling LOL
Ok - enough chatter - I may have more later when my brain is actually functioning at somewhat decent speed.
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